


Transience

by TellThemNaegi



Series: Before the Fall [1]
Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Despair, Developing Relationship, F/M, Gen, Introspection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-01
Updated: 2017-05-01
Packaged: 2018-10-26 04:08:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,089
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10779258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TellThemNaegi/pseuds/TellThemNaegi
Summary: It was in the Fall where Kyouko  found something irreplaceable.





	Transience

She hated this time of year.

The bell rang and chatter rose within the classroom signaling the end of the school day. The Ultimate Detective chosen by Hope’s Peak Academy packed up her belongings.

“Kyouko, want to hang out?” As she stood by the edge of the door, one of the fourteen other students of class 78 called out to her. If she was correct (and she usually was), this was Aoi Asahina. The proclaimed Ultimate Swimming professional or Super High School Level Swimmer as some people called it.

Neither was relevant because she had no intention of fraternizing with others in this school if she didn’t have to; much less someone so carefree as to address without any formality. There was only one reason for her being here…but that objective had been difficult to accomplish.

She spared the tanned girl a glance of declination and walked out of the classroom without so much as a word.

“Leave her, Hina. The princess is all about that stone-cold detective life, we peasants aren’t worth the time.” The one who spoke next was Junko Enoshima, The Ultimate Model; her voice carried out of the classroom. The words may have been overtly directed to the swimmer but they were obviously intended for her to hear as well.

Enoshima wasn’t incorrect so there was no need to defend herself…not that she would regardless. In addition, she snubbed them thus an unfavorable response was natural. She wasn’t socially inept enough to fail to realize that.

She trailed her way through the school and arrived at her destination; the highest floor in the building and where the principal’s office was located. Her mood soured just by being in close proximity to the door.

She hesitated knocking, as she often did. It was a weakness she couldn’t understand when her only purpose here was to get it over with

_Indecisiveness…_

After a few moments, she banged on the door. After half a minute without a response, she took the initiative and opened her way in. ~~Un~~ fortunately, there was nobody inside.

She sighed. As expected, never around when he was needed.

The detective made strolled into the room regardless. If nothing else, she may be able to find some incriminating evidence here. She chuckled darkly at the thought.

She circled around the desk to reach for the drawers.

“Watcha doing over here, Kirigiri?~” An obnoxious voice said. Even before facing the source, she knew it belonged to Enoshima.

She returned the question and desired to know if the model had been following her.

“You’re skulking around the place Solid Snake style but I’m the suspicious one? Upupu~”

Kyouko could see the conversation was going nowhere and there was nothing she really wanted in this place either.  Rather than responding to the woman’s provocation, Kyouko chose to walk past her and leave.

But as always, she had to have the last word.

“I’ll admit one thing: it sure is fun watching you run away from everything.”

More nonsense.

\---

Fall. She disliked this season.

She took in the dull gray scenery on a remote path. It was a time that signified the end of summer’s warmth and was a prelude to winter’s harshness – a season that was not loved for its own qualities but for its role as the metaphorical ‘calm before the storm’. Kyouko liked it when the immediate world around her was clear and simple; things that were non-committal were irritating.

Her destination was a spot some distance away from the school grounds. It may have been the only place she could relax outside of home and better yet, Kyouko was positive she was the only one who knew of it.

Well, there were always those rare occasions when she was wrong too.

The garden was usually more glamorous during the summer but even now, it had passable ambiance. The Koi pond had lost its glisten but was still clear enough to entrance – the falling leaves from dying trees did little to change that. Kyouko strolled through the bridge over the water and arrived at a decorated bench in the middle of the garden. The bench was 3 quarters of a square to leave room for passage and under a similarly decorated roof to ward off rain and snow. It was a stage out of a fairy tale.

That was where Kyouko first noticed him, a boy of small stature lying down on the bench asleep. His appearance was youthful enough that she couldn’t discern whether he was of middle or high-school age from visual observation alone. He had layers of upper clothing wrapped in a green hoodie and white pants.

His brown hair disheveled and body shivering. Kyouko wasn’t sure why someone would sleep outside like this but she didn’t really care; she was more interested in why he was even here.

The garden was somewhat old and not easy to navigate into, she presumed that’s why there were rarely visitors…then this boy was intelligent enough to do so or he was simply lost.

It irritated her regardless and she had half-a-mind to wake him up and “coerce” him to leave.

Kyouko sighed. She had come too far to simply turn back empty-handed and she let her more socially accommodating and responsible side get the better of her and sat on the bench.

Not bothering to acknowledge the sleeping boy’s existence any more than necessary, Kyouko picked up one of the books she had brought with her and began reading in silence.

  ---

She heard a yawn. Sneaking a peek in the boy’s direction, she noticed him wake.

The next thing she knew, he looked at her and yelped…really. Did he think she was a ghost?

“Ah sorry, you scared me.” He stuttered like a child

She didn’t need to be told that after his overreaction so she simply nodded and went back to her reading.

“Um excuse me?” He called again much to her frustration.

Kyouko looked up at him again, wordlessly signaling he had her attention.

“Do you know what time it is?” He asked

She looked at her watch and succinctly told him the time had been half past four.

He screamed again. The pitch on this boy would have been something to admire if her ears weren’t reeling. He could give that colorful-haired upperclassman a run for her money.

“I’m late! They’re going to kill me if they find out!” He yelled out loud. What he referred to was something she obviously had no idea about nor did she care to know.

“Sorry for the disturbance and thank you.” He ran out, finally leaving her alone in peace.

Unfortunately, Kyouko also noticed it had gotten dark and it wasn’t proper for a student like herself to launder after dark - Sakakura would probably raise a fuss as head of security. That was an event she wanted to avoid and thus she left not long after.

She was certain next week would be a quieter visit.

 ---

Even the best detectives could have a bad streak and be wrong twice in a row.

The boy was there just like the previous week, only this time he was wide awake which did not bode well for her.

“Oh it’s you, the girl from before.” He waved.

She had little time to discern the sort of person he was during their last interaction but based on his welcome, he was similar to Asahina in cheer. He seemed to have a more Earthly and reserved aura to him though.

She nodded in acknowledgement

“Sorry about all the screaming, I usually come here to hang out and haven’t seen anybody asides from you that time…I kind of thought you were a ghost…with the hair and all.”

So he _did_ think she was a ghost? How childish.

He gave an apologetic bow.

Did he think she would take offence? She wasn’t that petty…if anything, she found his observations more comedic than anything else.

She sat down on the other side of him on the bench and reached for the books in her bag.

A few minutes later, she took the time to gaze at the boy who enjoyed a cup of miso soup from a container.

She also noticed the oddities in his appearance…or to be precise the lack of them. He wore the exact same clothes as before.  The hoodie was one thing but why the pants too?

“Is something wrong?” he said skittishly.

Great, now she looked like the odd one…still, for him to notice her like that meant he was reasonably perceptive. 

Kyouko then remembered the questions she had for the boy the previous day. She inquired as to how he was able navigate his way to the garden.

“Ah…hehe, I got lost and found my way here. My bad luck, I guess.” He scratched his hair.

Hmph, so it was pure chance after all. That was somewhat disappointing but wholly within expectations.

She returned to reading but she could feel the boy’s gaze still on her.

Annoying…did he expect a response? She had no intention of exposing herself or treading on the lives of others any more than necessary. At best, she may try to satisfy a fleeting curiosity. She wasn’t tactless enough to convey that fact verbally so she let her body posture and show of indifference, do it for her.

Sure enough, she felt his gaze leave her. She smirked in satisfaction at getting the message across.

Sounds of light snoring caused her looked up from the novel she was reading…and found he was asleep. She might have blushed from embarrassment…if blushing was something Kyouko Kirigiri did – She didn’t.

Over one hour passed. It was approaching 4pm and Kyouko remembered the boy’s reaction the previous week. She didn’t fancy a scream-fest again so she approached the sleeping figure and prodded him awake.

As his eyes slowly drifted open, she told him the time.

“Ah, thanks. I owe you one.” He smiled earnestly…honestly, because of such a little thing as that.

“See you again.” He ran off

Again? Does he believe we’ll meet for a third time? That kind of coincidence doesn’t happen and it’s not like he can find this place…wait, how had he gotten back here? Chance is unreliable. Even if he had stumbled onto this garden…that would only occur the first time and he would still need to leave and then come back but he made it sound like he’d been doing that for awhile.

She wanted to ask but he was already gone.

How peculiar.

\---

…How? She thought, staring at the boy who awaited her at the bench.

This time, she came on a weekday and earlier than normal but he was still there. Was he a stalker?

She dismissed the thought as ridiculous. Besides his disturbingly convenient timing, he gave none of the signs of someone with that kind of obsession. Plus he was too defenseless and easily read. Not to mention he had arrived before she did.

She mentally sighed and made her way over to the usual spot.

“You’re here at a weird time.” He addressed her.

She retorted by saying the same could be said of him.

He raised his eyebrows in confusion and then laughed it off. Nothing really seemed to get to him; she began to wonder if those smiles were even genuine or if he was just a smile junkie.

That was when she saw he was reading a novel. This time, she was the one to raise an eyebrow, the text was a Sherlock Holmes novel and the final edition even she had yet to read. In fact, that particular one was almost impossible to find. Even her grandfather only had a single copy and he let nobody come near it. How did this boy acquire one!? It would cost a fortune. If he had that kind of money, he should at least be able to afford a change of clothes once in a while.

She asked him where he purchased the item and when he began reading the Sherlock Holmes anthology.

“Oh, this old thing? I’ve been a fan of the series for a long time and I just got this edition from my little sister’s friend the other day. I hear she’s a famous author herself.”

So he was a fan? Why hadn’t he said anything when I read in front of him?

“Well, I could be wrong but you gave off the impression of not wanting to talk to me so…” He scratched his cheek.

Damn, it _was_ her fault.  She could have missed out on this golden opportunity; peers her age who read detective novels were nearly impossible to find and she was sitting right next to one the whole time, and he had _that_ edition.

 “A-Are you okay? You’ve been glaring at me pretty hard for a while.” He said bashfully.

She mentally cursed… he had struck at her weakness and she had no idea if it was intentional. Consequently…she folded.

“You want to read with me?” He stated the obvious.

She muttered a yes. Kyouko had always internally mocked Togami for his obnoxious fixation on his pride but now she knew how it felt after demeaning herself like this.

He giggled…and then laughed. To be honest, it was kind of adorable.

He offered her a seat next to him and they read together for the remainder of the afternoon. At some point, he had dozed off and rested his head on her shoulder. At that point she had stopped reading his novel and returned to her own.

It…didn’t feel right about skipping ahead without him. It was his book after all.

She woke him up a little earlier than normal.

He blushed when he noticed the position they were in. She intentionally allowed it just to see his reaction…they were pretty interesting.

He stood up and prepared to leave

“If it’s alright for me to ask, are you going to be here tomorrow?” He asked, embarrassed

Kyouko nodded and told him she’d be there.

He smiled in turn and before he could run off, she asked him a question she’d been holding back. How was he able to consistently find this place?

“That? I just marked the trees on my way here the first time around –I know quite a bit about them, like when they change and stuff. The landscape remains the same and it’s easier since the trees are thinning out with winter coming. Now I know my way around the place like the back of my hand.”

I see…what a clever boy.

\---

As the months passed, night came faster and the sky grayer during the mornings. Fall was coming to a close. The two had grown closer during that period and generally met in the garden twice a week.

They discussed readings as well as got to know each other’s quirks and even interacted in a friendly manner…yet they didn’t know each other’s names. Before the duo knew it, they had already become friends without such a vital piece of information. It made their relationship special in its own way; a symbol of an unspoken agreement to not tread onto each other’s private affairs.  It was a childish sentiment but one they felt had its charms.

Though at this point, they both had more than an inkling of each other’s secrets without needing to say anything. The garden had become a remote fairy tale world where they could forget the tribulations of their lives.

With the day growing shorter, they decided to meet up at earlier times. It was a dreary morning, droplets of snow started to fall and the lake had begun to freeze over. In response to the cold, the boy started wearing a heavier set of clothes.

He was now resting soundly on her lap while she read.

“Hey.” He tried to get her attention “You go to Hope’s Peak right?”

Hmm? The academy seemed to be a topic he’d usually avoid. She had come in the academy uniform many times and he never made so much as a mention despite the reaction most people would give to an ultimate. She presumed he just didn’t care. Nevertheless, she answered yes.

“Do you know Sayaka Maizono?” He asked

She frowned. Kyouko had nothing against the  idol in particular; if anything, she considered Maizono to be among the most amiable people she had ever met but something about the sense of loss in his tone  when referring to her stung a bit. Perhaps he was one of her many rabid fans.

“Yeah I’m a fan but it’s more personal than that. See we used to go to the same middle school. I kind of got the feeling that she wanted to talk me but…I was always kind of afraid, like I wasn’t good enough for that.”

A stupid sentiment, she thought. Maizono  wasn’t the sort of person who would care that much about status to begin with.

“Just thinking of a missed opportunity...I could have gone to Hope’s Peak, you know?” He said. Now that was a bit of a surprise…did that mean he had a talent she wasn’t aware of?

“I was chosen to be the Ultimate Lucky Student but I lost my candidacy after an incident. If I had gone, I probably would have introduced myself and try to be friends this time. Oh well, It was a lesson…there are just some things that only happen at a certain time and when that period is over, that’s the end. That’s why I think…you should probably grab onto important things before they slip away from you. That way you won’t have any regrets.”                            

He gave a telling stare directed towards her as he spoke but he didn’t elaborate on his meaning so she didn’t ask. That was the nature of their relationship.

Still, that didn’t mean she couldn’t mock how he was anything but lucky given he had a habit of ending up in embarrassing situations around them. Last time, his shoes came untied and he nearly fell into the pond.

He blushed.

“Yeah I think I’m awake now, wanna read?” He smiled, trying to change the subject.

She could still see dark lines underneath his eyes but he seemed energetic enough so she agreed.

A cold chill blew their way, causing the teens to shiver.

Kyouko remarked her dislike for the season

“Hmm? Why’s that?” He asked.

She explained that it was an unimportant time, merely a transitory period shifting in the middle between a season that was loved and one people wanted to get away from. It had little worth of its own. Nothing good came from floating.

“Sounds like there’s a bit more to it than that but I won’t ask. I think you’re wrong though.”

Kyouko inquired on what his logic was centered on.

“I take it you’ve never been here in the fall?” He answered with a question.

She was confused.  While he was technically correct, what was the issue? She was here now and she saw nothing.

“Give it time. I’m good at noticing these things.”  He answered

She thought it a vague and unsatisfying response.

\---

“Hey, Kyouko.” It was Asahina again; the girl had a knack of trying to reach out to her. Kyouko didn’t think the swimmer was nearly as much of an irritant as she used to be. She was nice in her own way. Did she need something?

“Nothing much. We – I mean, I just noticed you’ve been a lot less gloomy lately.” It took a great deal of effort to curb her detective tendencies and point out the sheer number of errors Asahina had made in that statement...but where did the girl, who had obviously been put up to this, want to go with her insinuation?

“I just want to know if…if” She stuttered.

“Hina wants to know if you’re nailing somebody and if so? Is he hot?” Junko yelled from back in the classroom.

Kyouko would be lying if she said she didn’t see this coming. She hadn’t tried very hard to hide her consecutive trips out of the school. She surmised even her classmates had thought up their own ideas as to the relationship between her trips and change in outlook.

Why did it even matter?

 “I didn’t mean to be nosy, I was just wondering if something good happened. Not that it’s a bad thing, you’ve been smiling more and I think it’s really pretty.” She said.

She didn’t have the heart to tell the poor girl that was exactly what being nosy meant. Hina’s words were sweet though…wait, she had been smiling more?  She hadn’t noticed. It would be his fault in that case.

_Ms.Kirigiri, please report to the principal’s office_

A voice called out her name from the speakers

“oooooh, daddy’s little girl’s in trooouuuble.” Junko jeered.

Kyouko sighed. This was going to be a long day. She just hoped he wouldn’t be there waiting.

\---

“Kyouko…there is something important I wish to discuss but first I’ve heard that you’ve been to my office quite a few times while I was away. Did you need something?”

His words were scathing. When was he ever around when she needed something? And when her intentions were so blatantly clear, he would dare to ask? Kyouko seethed but kept those emotions bottled inside. She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of watching her break so she merely dismissed the importance of her visits as irrelevant.

“I see…then I will move on with what I intended to discuss.” He breathed and looked me square in the eyes…not good. She demanded he get to the point and quit stalling.

“Very well. I am getting remarried and I want your blessings.” He asked.

An unbearably awkward silence passed between them

Kyouko’s reasoning had stopped functioning for a moment. This man…was simply unbelievable. There was a limit to how unreasonable someone could be…

Kyouko gave up.

She merely told him to do as he pleased. Why would the blessings of an unrelated party matter to him? After all, they weren’t even family – he saw to that years ago.

She left the office, ignoring his cries.

She had come to the academy to break off all ties with that man but that never mattered to him from the beginning. What an idiot she was. Her indecisiveness had given him the initiative and now he told her he would start a _new_ family? He might as well have told her she had been replaced.

Before Kyouko knew it, she ran. Where? There was only one place she could go to clear her head; the place where _he_ was.

In the dark, she saw him sleeping on the bench as he commonly did. It was such a stupid thing to do at this time, especially with winter creeping up…but she knew.

Kyouko made her way over to his resting form and prodded him awake as she had done so many times before.

Only this time, he didn’t move.

 She pressed against him more forcefully next, to no avail.

In short breaths, Kyouko took off her left glove and slapped the boy in the face with her scarred hands.

“Huh?” His eyes jolted awake. She placed the gloves back on immediately

“Why’d you slap me!?”  He said, holding his reddening cheek…the color could be seen so clearly in the dark because…the rest of his skin had become near- equivalently pale.

 “Why are you scared?” He asked worried, as if she was the one who needed it. That made her angrier than anything.

She turned away and harshly told him to go home and that she didn’t have any classes tomorrow. It was a lie. Kyouko had classes but she wouldn’t go.

Kyouko faced the harsh truth; that she couldn’t be here either…so she ran away from him.

\---

The next day came. She prepared to leave first thing in the morning. On her way to the gate, she met someone she didn’t expect. It was Sakura Oogami, The Ultimate Fighter and the strongest person in the world. She seemed to be waiting for someone and when the ogre’s gaze locked onto Kyouko’s, she knew that person had been her.

“You are here, Kirigiri. I have been waiting.” She declared.

Kyouko couldn’t think of what Oogami wanted with her. She held a great deal of respect for the fighter but they had almost never interacted.

“You are intending to skip class, am I correct?”

How did she know?

“As loathe as I am to say it, rumors circulate fast. While I am not one to care for them, this one in particular is one I cannot ignore as it involves my classmate.  The rumors say principal Kirigiri is re-engaged and that you were seen leaving the school grounds frantically last evening.”

Kyouko looked down. Just perfect, she had become the laughing stock of the school. Damn that man…no, why should it even matter? She has no purpose here anymore.

 “I dislike involving myself in the affairs of others unless they allow me. I judge all of you as respectable individuals capable of solving your own problems and I consider you to be among the most capable people I have ever laid eyes on. It is for that reason that I ask: How long do you intend to run from your problems, Kirigiri?” She said, with a look of disappointment.

“Do you think we haven’t noticed? The year is nearly over and yet you go out of your way to distance yourself from the rest of us. Do not pretend that it is out of spite or some loner’s mentality; even Togami does not sink to such a level and his arrogance surpasses that of the entire schools combined.”

She asked on what basis did Sakura’s make that accusation.

“You deny us but you do not look down on us - that is why. Hina has tried her very best to reach out to you but you have rejected her every time…but that is all. You reject her advances but you only do so when she approaches you and to each request specifically; that means you at least acknowledge her as someone worth speaking to. If you truly did not care then you would have made yourself clear months ago that you wanted nothing to do with her and Hina would have gotten the message.  Instead you simply run from her kindness. Your measures are, to be frank, inept and the same goes for your relationship with the principal.” She said

Kyouko responded indignantly, believing the fighter had gone out of line.

“Am I wrong? My hypothesis is that you distance yourself from us because you did not intend to make lasting relationships from the very beginning and your frequent visits to the principal’s office suggest that your only purpose here is to break off ties with him…but you have yet to do that after all this time.

I had suspected this but I also expected you would have either let go of your grudges and immersed yourself with the rest of us on the ground or, if not, you would have rejected him and chosen to fly away long ago…instead you’ve done nothing but float in-between, achieving nothing and I believe that has led to the worst-case scenario.” She surmised.

The ogre’s words weren’t untrue.

“The past is done with so what will you do now, Kirigiri?”

She raised her head to meet the martial artist square on.

“One of the reasons I have come is to invite you to Hina’s birthday party in the coming week. She is not the type to go out of her way to do so, therefore I shall take up that responsibility in her stead. Now, what will you do, Kirigiri? Will you come with us? Will you leave Hope’s Peak for good? …Or will you run to that person with your problems?”

Kyouko’s eyes widened.  Was she referring to him? And how did she know?

“That reaction…so Junko was right. We will accept either choice…but do not force your problems onto the shoulders of others, Kirigiri. That is among the worst affronts you can make as a person.”

Kyouko wanted to tell the ogre their relationship wasn’t so dependent…yet wasn’t that what she wanted to do yesterday? She wanted to use him to absolve the pain when he already carried burdens greater than hers.

“I will wait for your answer tomorrow.” Sakura stepped aside

And Kyouko ran

\---

It was an odd occurrence for her to arrive first.

 During all their meetings, she had never once been the first to arrive; he would always meet her with a warm welcome. Sitting on the bench now, she realized how lonely the view was.

Hours passed while she waited expectantly and soon she fell asleep.

\---

“Hey, you okay?” A voice stirred her awake

Their eyes met as he looked at Kyouko with a guilty expression.

She checked her watch and saw it was already 1pm in the afternoon. She hadn’t waited for anyone that long since Jin.

“Sorry, I ran into a few problems on my end.  Are you okay?” He asked again.

She didn’t understand it. How could _he_ be the one telling her that in his condition? She took in his appearance. His hair more disheveled than before (and that said something), eyes barely open and his skin sickly pale. Compared to when she first met him, it was like the life had been sucked out of him.

Moreover…his clothes were the same as ever. Of course it would be…

What was she thinking hinting at him to come over today after what happened when she tried that hard to wake him the previous day? Sakura was right. She was shameless.

“There’s something bothering you, isn’t there? Just tell me and I’ll help if I can.” He said, earnestly.

That only made her feel even more guilty so she tried to refuse him. Kyouko told the boy that she had no intentions of butting into anyone’s private life so nobody has any right to do the same to hers.

 “Hmm, that’s just an excuse though, right?” He said, sounding absolutely sure of himself.

Kyouko looked taken aback by the accusation. The shorter boy chuckled.

“You said it yourself. You don’t interfere with others because you don’t want the same to be done to you. It’s your defense-mechanism to avoid getting hurt.” He added

This wasn’t how it was supposed to go. He wasn’t supposed to force these kinds of topics.

Kyouko switched tactics and used the words Sakura had spoken earlier. It hurt somewhat for they were words that she believed were right and consequently, felt guilty about for projecting her insecurities onto the boy.

“Eh…I don’t know how to say this but, those aren’t your own words. Are they?”

Kyouko raised her hand to cover her mouth.

“See, you’re usually so confident about stuff you say, it’s like I’m talking to a university professor some times. But _that_ time seemed forced…like you were reading from a script. And it’s not like I don’t know you’re trying to make excuses anyway.” He said

Did he really understand how she thought that much? She considered him possibly the closest person to her asides from grandfather but this was the first time their knowledge of each other had been tested openly.

The boy scratched his chin as he always did “Could you tell me what’s going on? I don’t think I’ll stop worrying unless you do.  You had me worried last night too after you ran off like that…and I don’t think I can afford that, if I’m being honest.”

Kyouko winced at his proclamation. After deliberating, she decided to meet the middle. She did not tell him names, identities or specifics, merely the gist of her situation.

“I see…that person sounds like a really good friend.” He surmised

Kyouko explained that she and Oogami weren’t really friends but he gave her a distrustful look.

“I don’t think they would have gone to such lengths as waiting at the school gates for you if you weren’t important to them or do you see strangers or acquaintances giving lectures like that to others.”

He had a point.

“But I can’t say I agree with them. That sort of advice doesn’t work with everybody because…there are some people who don’t have the strength to stay grounded or the freedom to fly no matter how hard they try.” He said, solemnly.

Kyouko wanted to look away.

“And not everyone can handle problems by themselves, it would be worse if they thought they _could_ do impossible things alone...kind of like you’ve been trying to.  Being frank, I’ll be the one who decides if I want to be burdened by the suffering of other people. Nobody else has the right to decide that.” He said with a strength that Kyouko was surprised he had.

 “I kind of feel responsible, maybe I was too vague with my words back then.” He sighed “Just how long do you think he’s going to wait for you?” He looked at her with the same disappointed gaze Sakura had given her hours ago. He didn’t refer to any names because that was their agreement; a thin veil that covered nothing yet meant the world to them.

“I can piece it together well enough. He told you about his plan because he wanted to know how you felt about it. If he didn’t care about you, why even bother? The only other explanation is that he’s a super sadist who gets off to watching you suffer. I don’t know if that’s what **_you_** think about him but from I’ve been told, that doesn’t seem to be the case.”

He strolled out of the bench and grabbed her hand. They stopped to look at a giant tree standing near the pond and overshadowing the roof.  All the while, she couldn’t help notice he was wobbling a little.

Kyouko’s was confused. All she could see were dead branches.

“You told me that you disliked fall because it’s an intermediate term without any worth of its own. I don’t agree with that either…because there _are_ things that happen at this time that have worth, you know.  Come back to this place in a bit and you’ll see what I mean but…wait too long and it’ll pass you by.”  He smiled and then stumbled

“I...I’m tired.” He said abruptly. Before he fell over on the spot, Kyouko caught him in her arms and brought the boy to rest on the bench.

His eyes closed and breathing steadied.

Kyouko took notice of the books he had brought with him. They had yet to finish the last one but she could amuse herself with the others while she waited.

2 hours passed before he awoke, head on her lap.

“Huh? I fell asleep?” He said, quizzically.

She nodded.

“Oh I remember, we were talking about you…I think.”

She affirmed his recollection and reminded him about how tediously he’d berated her. He giggled in response.

“You know…I do agree with something your friend said.”

She listened intently.

“It doesn’t really matter what you choose, it’ll be fine with me….as long as it’s what you want. There’s nothing wrong with loneliness or isolating others from your life, just make sure that you do it for your own sake.  If you don’t want to be friends with the guys in your class then say it clearly and honestly. If you can’t forgive that person and want to break it off, then tell him. Holding half-assed grudges and doing things haphazardly won’t help anyone. And if that’s not what you want then you’re just hurting yourself and the people who care about you needlessly.”

Kyouko let his words sink in. He was right in every respect. She didn’t know what she wanted but she alienated everyone around her regardless and where did that get her? But that also sparked anger within her….Who was he to tell her this when he was no better? Their circumstances may be different but there’s no way what he’s been doing could be considered appropriate.  She wanted to tell him off on it so badly…but that would be using him as an excuse…and she wouldn’t let herself hurt him.

 How can they both be so smart and yet so stupid?

“Guess I screwed up and broke the agreement.” He laughed. The unsung promise was that we could be together in a place where we could escape the worries of our daily lives…and he ripped that apart himself. What a selfish person. In that regard, they were two peas in a pod.

Even speaking ambiguously, he said enough where it didn’t even matter and to leave matters floating like this was no good. Kyouko Kirigiri liked things clear and simple.

She consented to heeding the boy’s words on a single condition.

“Name it.” He said, innocuously.

Tears threatened to fall from her eyes.

“Don’t preach to me when you’re still a brat yourself. Stop being selfish and go back to the hospital; a patient as sick as you running around the place must have someone worried to death.” She smiled. Her words admonished him but even moreso, they were a farewell.

She delivered the final blow on the spell that kept them together. Yes, she had realized long ago, perhaps after their fifth meeting. His constant sleeping habits. His listlessness. His messy appearances. The clothes. The latter was the biggest giveaway.

Why wear the same assortment of clothing every day?  She had entertained the possibility that he was homeless but she had sat next to him multiple times and he smelled clean. Abuse? Unlikely, his cheer was genuine and he never had so much as a bruise on his frail body.  The only other explanation was that the boy was a patient at a medical ward - His clothes were also clean meaning he either washed the same pair repeatedly or he had several sets of the same attire in stock. His hoodie was one thing but the pants were standard hospital wear.

What an idiot, she thought. He didn’t have to kill himself just to keep coming to see her.

The idiot laughed and picked himself up.

“I see…if that’s what you’ve chosen then I can’t refuse. I know you’ll do fine.”

“Really? What if I don’t know what to do?”

“Hmm, I can’t really answer that for you but for what I think, you should place them on a scale and decide for yourself whether it would make you happy to keep those bonds or toss them aside. Then think about whether you would feel sad afterwards if you did.” He explained

She nodded

The boy reached for his belongings but Kyouko outsped him, grabbed the final novel away and held it in front of his face.

“I wasn’t done reading.”  She said

“Huh?” He stuttered

“I’ll be keeping this until I’m finished reading…and I don’t intend to finish it alone so I guess I’ll just hold onto it until you’re well enough to come back.” She said with a voice that wouldn’t approve any objections.

“Eeeh? How unreasonable.” He said.

“Okay. I’ll see you in 15 days.” He spoke with newfound energy.

Before he could leave, Kyouko pulled out her pinky and motioned for him to do the same.

They crossed.

“Kyouko” She said after some time.  “My name, its Kyouko Kirigiri.”

“Kyouko…I knew you’d have a pretty name.”  It rolled well off the tongue “I’m Makoto. Makoto Naegi.”

\---

She didn’t go back there the coming week. The next day of class, Kyouko was the first to arrive. She bowed in front of the students to express her apology. Needless to say, the majority freaked out and thought it was unnecessary…but it warmed them regardless. Sakura and even Junko smiled in approval. Perhaps he had been right – maybe she did have people who cared about her the entire time and just didn’t know it. Not long after, she and Hina had become a tight-knit duo as of the latter girl’s birthday party. While Kyouko still found herself overwhelmed by the swimmer, she was… happy.

Her relationship with her father didn’t go nearly as smoothly however, that was to be expected. Forgiveness wasn’t easily handed, she told him it had to be earned. As for how he would make it up to her that was for him to think about. On her part, she would be accommodating – that was the most she could do.

Time flew as Kyouko eagerly waited the moment she would meet him again. A mere two days before the promised time, she came across Sayaka Maizono in the hallway. While she wasn’t as close to the idol as with Hina, they were friends…so it was unnerving to see the blue-haired girl with such a grave expression. She appeared to have been crying. Kyouko approached to see if she could be of any assistance. The pop sensation shook her head and tried to assure the detective that it wasn’t something that could be helped. Kyouko didn’t push the issue. Touko was also absent that day.

15 days had passed since their farewell and the seasons were on the cusp of winter. Kyouko arrived at the garden through the snowy trail with novel in hand and marveled at the scenery.

The once naked tree had bloomed cherry blossoms rivaling her own hair color. It stood as such a magnificent height that the falling blossoms magnified by the white snow beautified the entire landscape. She had once believed the garden’s splendor was its peak during the summer but evidently, she had been proven wrong by him…again. The view she saw then couldn’t compare to this

However, Kyouko was sure it would have been an even more stunning sight had he been there in the middle of it, sleeping away on the bench like always.

Kyouko sat in the seat next his, clutched the novel against her chest and waited.

Fall had once been her most hated season for its transitional nature yet it was in that transient period where she had found something irreplaceable.

 

 


End file.
